December 24^th, 2003:

Buffy and Annie laid together on the couch in the great room watching the lights of the Christmas tree dance and sparkle off the tinsel, ornaments and the presents under it, but neither of them was very excited about the prospect of celebrating Christmas without Spike. After leaving the Hyperion ten days ago, Spike hadn’t returned to the mansion or called or even contacted Buffy through their bond. When she tried to contact him, he had her shut out, so she couldn’t tell where he was or what he was doing. She hadn’t even been able to tell him that the Buffy in the tape with Angel wasn’t her.

In her mind, the tape was obviously of a Buffy from some ‘bizarro-world’ dimension where she was with Angel instead of Spike. How it had gotten here, and who delivered it to Spike, was a complete mystery. Of course, Spike would say that Angel had done it to drive a wedge between them. Buffy had questioned Angel at length about it after Spike stormed out, and Angel swore that he knew nothing about the tape – he didn’t send it; he didn’t make it; he knew nothing about it . . . but maybe if he could look at it, he could figure out where it came from. That, of course, was a ‘world of NO’.

Buffy didn’t know whether to believe him or not, but there were plenty of other suspects in Buffy’s mind. The Watcher’s Council led the pack as far as she was concerned . . . even though she quit them, that didn’t mean they quit her – and they never approved of her being with Spike . . . soul or no soul – he was still a vampire in their eyes – no different than any other vampire. There were also any number of enemies . . . known and unknown that would want Buffy and Spike separated – they were much stronger together . . . much easier to defeat apart.

Willow had done numerous locator spells looking for Spike, but none had worked. She’d done it so often that she just left the map and supplies out on the research table now all the time. Buffy wondered what good locator spells were when they could be so easily foiled with amulets from the magic shop . . . but they did work sometimes and she didn’t know anything else to try. Spike could be anywhere in the entire world at this point and Buffy had no idea how to find him.

Annie also knew that something bad was going on, but the adults wouldn’t tell her exactly what. They told her that Spike was on a mission and would be back soon, but Annie knew that locator spells weren’t done for people that were just on a mission . . . she’d seen them too many times in her young life. She also knew that even when her father was on a mission, he would call her every night, if at all possible, and certainly it never went longer than two or three days between calls – he hadn’t called her at all for ten days now. She had counted them.

“Doesn’t Papa love us anymore?” Annie asked sadly as she lay with Buffy on the couch.

Tears stung Buffy’s eyes and she closed them tightly to hold the flood back. “Of course he does, sweet girl. He loves you more than anything,” Buffy told her, squeezing her daughter tighter against her side.

“Why doesn’t he call us?” Annie asked.

Buffy sighed heavily. She wished she knew the answer to that.

Buffy’s mind drifted back to the long days when Spike had disappeared before, when Angel first returned from the hell dimension and Spike misunderstood her intentions when she told Angel that she forgave him and would always love him.

Buffy knew, despite his outward bravado, Spike still had a poet’s heart, William’s heart, and was easily hurt. But he wasn’t a quitter. She remembered how angry he was when he thought she had given up on him, on them, when she went down into the Hellmouth alone to fight The First. She felt sure that, no matter how broken-hearted he may be, he wouldn’t simply run out on them now. Now he would fight for her, and for Annie, if he thought anyone, most especially Angel, was going to take his family away from him.

There were a thousand possibilities to explain Spike not calling Annie or coming home – none of them good – and they’d all weighed heavily on Buffy’s mind. She prayed that the Gem of Amarra would protect him from harm . . . but she could find no explanation for him not at least calling Annie other than serious harm befalling him.

“Mama?” Annie prodded her.

“I don’t know, baby . . . he’s probably just really busy with the mission and can’t find a phone. You know, like the time I was in South America . . . I couldn’t always find a phone, remember? But never doubt that he loves you, because he does – with all his heart.”

“Can we wait until he gets back to open the presents?” Annie asked as she hugged tighter to Buffy’s side.

“Sure, baby . . . that would be fine. We’ll just have Christmas when Papa gets back.”

**~**

Sunday, December 28^th, 2003:

“What about Wolfram & Hart?” Buffy asked looking around the lobby at Angel and his crew.

“Buffy, you really don’t want to get in bed with them,” Angel told her. His injuries from the beating he took from Spike over ten days ago had all pretty much healed, although he still had some pain in his forearms where Spike had shattered the bones.

Buffy had driven up to L.A. with Annie so she could try and find some clue as to where Spike was. She didn’t know what else to do and she was tired of sitting around waiting for Spike to come home or a locator spell to work. Lorne had taken Annie out for ice cream again while Buffy spoke with Angel and his people about how to find Spike. She’d already talked to the Scoobies and Giles until they were all weary of hearing her talk about it, especially since they didn’t have any answers for her – so, she decided to try Angel’s gang to see if they could come up with anything new.

“But they have resources we don’t have,” Buffy argued. “You’ve worked with them before.”

“I worked with Lindsey before – there’s a big difference. Lindsey had a small shred of decency left in his soul . . . the rest of them don’t,” Angel told her. “You’ll owe them for the rest of your life if they help you. If you don’t believe me, ask Lindsey.”

“What about that Morgan woman? She seemed all keen to help you before,” Buffy prodded him.

Angel rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I’m still waitin’ on them to call in the marker on that. Buffy, I’m tellin’ you, help from Wolfram & Hart is not an option.”

“What about you, Cordelia? Can’t you get a vision or something?” Buffy asked, looking at the brunette.

“It doesn’t work that way, Buffy,” Cordy informed her. “They show up when the PTB decide, not me.”

Buffy sighed. They didn’t have any new ideas on how to find Spike, either.

“Can’t you feel him?  Your bond should be stronger than mine,” Buffy asked Angel – it was a long shot, she knew.

“Buffy, I didn’t turn Spike . . . if Dru was here, maybe she could find him, but, believe me, your bond is much stronger than mine with Spike,” Angel told her.

Buffy nodded slowly and rubbed at her eyes. She was so tired, she hadn’t been sleeping and she was worried about Spike and about Annie – she missed her father so much. It wasn’t like Spike to not call Annie . . . where could he possibly be that would stop him from at least calling his daughter?

**~**

Buffy looked at the clock on the wall . . . six in the evening – the sun had been down an hour already. The meeting with Angel’s crew had broken up a while ago and Lorne and Annie still hadn’t returned. How far away is that ice cream shop, anyway? Buffy got up off the seat in the center of the lobby and walked into Angel’s office where he was reading a book.

“Where is that ice cream shop? I’ll just go get her so we can get going,” Buffy said to him.

Angel told her where he thought Lorne and Annie had gone and Buffy headed out on foot from the hotel, following Angel’s directions. Angel offered to go with her, but Buffy assured him that she could find it . . . he didn’t have to come.

At the ice cream shop Buffy asked the clerk if he had seen Annie and Lorne. Lorne was just slightly unforgettable, being tall and green and dressed like a Las Vegas circus act. The clerk told Buffy he had seen them, but that had been over two hours ago.

Buffy went back out to the sidewalk and looked around. She didn’t see any other shops or playgrounds or anything that would’ve been of interest to Annie, but that didn’t mean Lorne didn’t know of one and took her someplace else. She decided to just head back to the Hyperion . . . they were probably there waiting for her, anyway.

When she walked into the hotel lobby, Angel came out of his office. “Did you find it alright?” he asked her.

“Yeah, but they had left a long time ago,” Buffy told him. “They aren’t back yet?”

Angel shook his head.

“Where else would they go?” Buffy asked him. She was starting to get a bad feeling . . . a bad ‘Mom’ feeling and she felt her stomach tighten slightly with worry.

“I’m sure they’re fine, Buffy,” Angel told her when he heard her heart rate increase. “Lorne probably took her shopping or something . . . he’s kind of a fashionista.”

Buffy rolled her eyes . . . that was an understatement! “Does he have a cell phone?”

“Oh, yeah! I always forget about those stupid things. Mine never works right. Those things were definitely cooked up by a bored warlock,” Angel said, heading back into his office to get the number.