When Lorne finished, he laid a sleeping Billy down gently in the other bassinette, which he’d put right next to Dani’s so they were actually touching, and tucked a small blanket around him.  Lorne looked up and saw Buffy in the doorway and made a “shhhh” sign with his finger to his lips before he moved slowly away from the babies and finally out the door of the training room.

“I thought they only liked, you know – classic rock,” Buffy said when Lorne had shut the door behind him.

“That is classic, Sunshine!” Lorne told her.  “Turns out you don’t have to be a head banger to get them to sleep . . . actually, if you just put their cribs closer together, I think you’ll find that the screaming banshees will disappear.”

Buffy furrowed her brow in thought. “Put their cribs closer together?  They’re in the same room,” she pointed out.

Lorne shook his head. “I’m telling you – put them closer together – they need to be touching – they need to be close – like peas in a pod . . . like two babies in a womb.”

“Are you serious?!  All that screaming and not sleeping because they . . . they weren’t close enough to each other?!” Buffy asked with wide eyes.

Lorne nodded. “Trust me, Sunshine, all your troubles will be solved if you just let the babies be what they are – two parts to one whole.  Those babies are special – I can see it in them, they aren’t just twins, they share a soul . . .” Lorne informed her.

“Share a soul?  That’s not . . . that’s not good, is it? I mean – that’s worse than sharing a toothbrush!”

“Don’t you share your soul with someone?” Lorne asked.

“Yeah, I guess . . . but she’s in another dimension – not here . . .” Buffy responded.

“No, that’s not who I mean, Sunshine,” Lorne told her, laying a hand on her shoulder. “It’s true your soul is divided between other ‘Buffys’ in other dimensions, but the person I was talking about is Spike.”

Buffy shook her head. “We don’t share a soul . . .”

“Do you know what a ‘soulmate’ is?” Lorne asked her, moving away from the door and over to the table in the research area.

Buffy followed him and they sat down at the table. “I guess – it’s someone that you click with, that you love . . .”

Lorne shook his head. “No, it’s more than that. Your soulmate completes you . . . it is the yin to your yang, it’s the other half of your soul.  The legend is that humans originally consisted of four arms, four legs and a single head with two faces and a single soul.  Zeus feared their power, and split them in half, condemning them to spend their lives searching for the other half that completes them.

“Buffy, your soulmate is Spike – don’t you know that?  Can’t you feel that?  Don’t you feel complete when he’s near you and a little empty when he’s gone?” Lorne asked her.

Buffy rubbed her eyes tiredly before looking back at Lorne. “Yeah . . . I feel that,” she admitted. “But you’re saying Dani and Billy are soulmates?  That’s bad . . . isn’t that bad – they’re brother and sister!”

Lorne shrugged. “I don’t know if I believe there’s only ONE soulmate in all the world for us . . . for their sake, I hope not . . . otherwise . . . well, Flowers in the Attic comes to mind . . .”

Buffy rolled her eyes. “Great!” Buffy stood up and started pacing back and forth. “Just fucking great! The PTB do nothing but fuck with us! Why the fuck would they do that to them!? Mother-fucking sons of Goddamn bitches . . .”

“Buffy!” Lorne said, putting a hand out to stop her pacing. “Sit down . . . c’mon, sit down and calm down.

“Why don’t you worry about that bridge when you get to it?  I’m just telling you so you’ll know – those babies, they need to be close, if they aren’t physically close, you’ll have screaming banshees . . . if they are, you’ll have angels.

“Most people never find their ultimate soulmate, Sunshine – you have, Spike has – you’re both lucky. The twins, well – they can find love and happiness outside themselves – it doesn’t have to turn out badly,” Lorne assured her.

“Do you think there’s more than one . . . like, I don’t know, maybe humans had eight legs and eight arms and eight faces . . .” Buffy asked Lorne.

Lorne smiled. “I do – I do think there can be more than one – or maybe there’s one ‘ultimate’ soulmate, but a few others that are ‘premium’ . . . and then maybe one or two that are just ‘regular’,” Lorne told her.

“Are we still talking soulmates or have you switched to gasoline?” Buffy asked with a smile.

Lorne laid a hand on one of Buffy’s and his smile faded. “Buffy, I see a lot more than I let on sometimes. I can see a lot about futures and destinies when people sing, but I can see a lot just from listening to them talk – you need to take care of your marriage, you can’t lose Spike to that . . . woman.”

“How did you . . . how did you know that?” Buffy asked Lorne.  “You can see that?”

Lorne nodded. “Spike is yours – you are his; she’s the intruder and you need to take care of it or she’ll drive you apart. Neither of you will ever recover if that happens – you’ll always be missing a part of yourself.  Don’t let her steal your love, don’t let her take your destiny from you.”

Tears stung Buffy’s eyes and she pressed her fingers against them hard to try and stop the flood. “I think it’s too late . . .” she told Lorne quietly, her hand still covering her face. “He’s . . . they’re . . . I think he’s chosen her.”

“Buffy, look at me,” Lorne said quietly, shaking his head slowly. “He hasn’t chosen her . . . but she’ll take him from you if you don’t take charge.  You’re The Slayer . . . BE The Slayer, Buffy. ‘Want, take, have’ . . . Faith used to say that all the time – you need to take back what’s yours.”

Buffy closed her eyes and rested her head heavily in her hands as she sat with her elbows on the table in front of her.

BE The Slayer . . . Want, take, have . . . Lorne’s words rang in her head. He hasn’t chosen her . . . want, take, have. 

He’s MY fucking husband! She doesn’t even know him – she only knew William – not Spike, she only loved William . . . I love them both – all of him.

What can she offer him?  She’s not even a demon anymore . . . she can’t fight, he’ll fucking break her unless he constantly holds back with her . . . She’s not his destiny – if she was his destiny, then the PTB wouldn’t have put him in Dru’s path that night . . . wouldn’t have sent him to Sunnydale at just the right time . . . wouldn’t have sent us Annie and Dani and Billy . . .

Oh God – why didn’t I kick her ass out when I realized it?  The PTB were finally trying to help you with that fucking dream and you just didn’t see it! Stupid . . . you have got to be the stupidest Slayer in the history of Slayers Buffy Summers-Weckerly . . . Weckerly . . . MRS. Weckerly . . .

Buffy raised her head up and looked at Lorne. “Where are they?”

Lorne shrugged. “Spike got a call from Clem and he left shortly afterwards, said he was gonna go on a short patrol of the sewers between here and the Bronze before sunset and would be back for dinner . . . A little while later, Hallie asked me to watch the babies, said she had to go out while.”

Buffy looked at the clock . . . 7:30 – if Spike was coming back for dinner, he should’ve been back by now. Buffy’s stomach tightened into a knot, what if she’d waited too long . . . what if she had let Hallie take him back?

“Will you watch Annie . . . she should be back down any minute . . .” Buffy asked Lorne as she stood up from the table and started towards the basement door and the sewer access down there – stopping only briefly at one of the weapon’s chests to retrieve a stake.

“Of course, Sunshine.  Don’t worry about us!” Lorne called after her.

“Make sure she got all the ice cream off her face and out of her hair . . .” Buffy called back over her shoulder as she headed down into the basement.

Buffy stepped into the sewer access tunnel and tried sending out her spidey senses to figure out which way Spike had gone . . . if she could find Spike, she was pretty sure she would find Hallie, too, but she couldn’t feel him.  It was dark outside now; he might have already gone up to the street . . . crap!

Buffy pulled her cell phone out, if old fashioned spidey senses didn’t work, then maybe new-fangled technology would . . . but she had no signal in the tunnel.  Think! He got a call from Clem . . . he was going to patrol between here and the Bronze . . . Clem musta overheard someone at Willy’s talking and called Spike to tell him what was going down . . . Ok, just head towards the Bronze . . . if he isn’t in the tunnels, then maybe he’s there.

Buffy started running through the tunnels, splashing through the dirty muck at her feet and covering her jeans with the gross, smelly water.  When she got to a split in the tunnel she stopped . . . both ways could take her to the Bronze – one went to the back of the Bronze, one went to the alley at the side . . . which way would Spike have gone?  Buffy closed her eyes and tried to clear her mind and just let kismet guide her – either the super heroine or the hand of fate, she didn’t care which at that point. 

Buffy opened her eyes and started running again, heading down the tunnel to the left – she was sure this was the way Spike had gone, she didn’t know how she was sure, but she was.  Buffy passed several piles of vampire dust floating in the dirty water on her way, but she kept going – those weren’t Spike – they were Spike’s doing, no doubt, but not Spike.

When she reached the ladder that lead to the street behind the Bronze, she climbed up quickly and slid the manhole cover off.  It made a loud clanging and scraping noise as she did it and she cringed internally, she wanted to be a little more stealthy than that.  Oh well, Buffy thought – time for stealth is over, time to be heard now.

Buffy pulled herself up through the manhole and looked around – the street was empty except for two more piles of vampire dust. She slid the cover back before closing her eyes and turning in a slow circle . . . but she still couldn’t feel him. Crap!

Buffy went to the side door of the club and stepped inside. He was in here . . . somewhere – she could sense him now.  The music as blaring and the place was packed with people – dancing, drinking, eating, making out . . . tons of people – the whole town of Sunnydale seemed to be there.   Of course! It was the semi-annual post-fumigation party – no wonder there were so many people – and so few cockroaches . . .

Buffy started walking through the crowds, looking for Spike.  She checked the bar and the tables in the back and ran into Willow and Tara, who had taken the night off from study to attend the semi-annual tradition, but they hadn’t seen Spike, either.  God, I wish we could get the bond back – that made it so much easier to find him! Buffy thought as she kept searching the crowded club.

Sure that he wasn’t on the first level, Buffy headed up the stairs to the upper level.  When she reached the landing, she saw him and sighed in relief . . . until she saw who he was sitting with – Hallie, and her heart sank.  Spike’s back was to Buffy and he was leaning forward towards Hallie in order to talk over the music.  Hallie was smiling and sipping at a drink – every once in a while, she’d say something that Buffy couldn’t hear.  Apparently Spike was doing most of the talking, but she couldn’t see his face.

Buffy circled around, trying to get closer to where they were sitting to try and hear the conversation without being detected.  She maneuvered behind a support post that was near their table and strained to hear what was being said.  As the band came to the end of the song, there was a lull in the music and Buffy heard Spike say, “wherever ya want,” then the singer in the band started talking and he drowned out most of Spike’s words; Buffy heard, “love . . . you . . . need . . . go . . .” before the music started again.

Oh God! I am too late!  He’s getting ready to go off with her – wherever she wants – he’s gonna go, he still loves her. He’s chosen her . . .

Tears stung Buffy’s eyes, she closed them and leaned heavily against the hard metal post at her back and tried to breathe . . . she felt like she’d just been kicked in the stomach, all the air had suddenly left her lungs. Buffy willed herself away from the post and walked back to the stairs, but broke down as she got to them and just sat down on the top step and buried her face against her knees, putting her arms over her head as she attempted to block out the words that she heard Spike say . . . but it was too late –they rang in her head like a funeral march, Wherever ya want . . . love you, need . . . go . . .

“Buffy?  Buffy, what’s wrong?” Willow asked, walking up to her and laying a hand on her shoulder. “Did you find Spike?”

Buffy nodded her head against her knees with her eyes still closed tight, trying to hold in the tears.

“Then what’s wrong?” Willow asked again, sitting down next to her on the step, putting an arm around Buffy’s shoulders and leaning her head down next to Buffy’s.

“He doesn’t love me . . . he loves Hallie . . . he chose Hallie,” Buffy told her.

“WHAT?! Did he tell you that?” Willow questioned.

“No . . . I heard . . . I overheard him,” Buffy told her.

“You OVERHEARD him . . . in here?” Willow asked, brows furrowed in confusion – how could she have overheard him with all this noise?

“Silentium!” Willow announced, waving her arm out to encompass the whole club and suddenly all the noise stopped – no one seemed to notice, they were still talking and dancing but for Buffy and Willow, there was only silence.

“Now,” Willow said without having to shout over the music and gaiety, “tell me exactly what you heard.”

Buffy drew in a deep breath and sat up. “Spike told Hallie that he loved her . . . that he would go with her wherever she wanted to go . . . that he needed her . . .”

“You overheard ALL that?” Willow asked, skeptically.

Buffy nodded and covered her face with her hands.

“Where are they?”

Buffy pointed back behind them where Spike and Hallie were sitting at small table in the back of the upper level.

“Audite!” Willow commanded, waving her arm at Spike and Hallie.  Suddenly Spike and Hallie’s voices could be heard clearly by Willow and Buffy – like those were the only sounds in the club.

“ . . . and I told you before you dizzy bint, I. Love. Buffy. You jus’ need to go on your merry way! I’ll bloody well pay you to leave – buy you a ticket – you can go wherever you want, but you need to go, now! I’m bloody well tired of you following me ‘round this town every time I step foot outside the soddin’ house!

“Whatever your game is, I ain’t playin – and I reckon the Slayer ain’t interested in playin’ it either – no matter how good you clean the bloody loo.”

Buffy sat in stunned silence . . . it was the words, but not . . . not the meaning that she’d inferred. ‘I love Buffy’ . . . he told Hallie ‘I love Buffy’! He was offering to pay her to leave! To go away! Oh God . . . oh, thank God!

“William, William, William,” Hallie said sweetly as she reached out and touched Spike’s hand. “I’m not going anywhere . . . I told you before, I’m perfectly happy where I am – a roof over my head, three square meals . . . you to keep me company . . .”

“I ain’t your bloody lap dog anymore, Cecily – and I sure as hell have no intention of keeping you comp’ny! You didn’ want William then and I can assure you, you don’t want Spike now,” Spike told her as he lifted her hand off his, squeezing it perhaps a little harder than was required, before dropping it back in her own lap.

“I made a mistake . . . it was an honest mistake, I mean really, William . . . ‘effulgent’?  But I’m big enough to admit my mistakes and I’m woman enough to make them right . . .  I can assure you that I’m woman enough to make it all up to you, William,” Hallie told him as she reached her hand out and caressed his thigh.

“Are you, now?” Spike asked with a smirk. “And what do you think you could give me that I don’ already have?”

Hallie smiled seductively and ran her hand further up his thigh until it was pressing against Spike’s groin as she leaned in closer to him. “Over a thousand years of experience from every corner of the world and beyond . . . I can do things to you your little girl couldn’t even imagine, William . . .”

 “That little girl’s got a pretty good imagination . . .” Spike told her with a smirk. “You think you can do better . . . show me . . .” he said as he started unfastening his belt.

Buffy’s heart pounded in her chest as she watched and listened . . . What is he doing? Has he lost his fucking mind? One minute he wants her to leave, the next he’s going to fuck her right here?

“Here?!” Hallie asked, alarmed, pulling her hand back and off Spike’s leg.

Spike shrugged. “Me and the Slayer, we’ve done it right there – in front a God ‘n everybody . . .” Spike told her, motioning with his head towards the railing of the upper level. “Thought you had imagination, pet. It’s no good without guts . . .”

Hallie straightened and lifted her chin.  If Buffy could do it, so could she . . . she would show him who had guts!  “Fine . . .” Hallie said a little too curtly. “Fine,” she said again, in a more seductive tone as she placed her hand back on Spike’s thigh, ran it back up to his crotch and gave his cock a hard squeeze. Hallie stood up, walked over to the railing and looked out at the revelers that were dancing and drinking below as she waited for Spike to join her.

Buffy started to stand up – to go put a stop to this whole thing, but Willow pulled her back down onto the step. “Just wait . . .” Willow told her. 

Buffy looked at Willow with concern. “What if he . . . what if they . . .” Buffy started but Willow just shook her head.

“Just wait . . .” Willow told her again. “If you stop this now, you’ll always wonder – what if you hadn’t, would he have? Trust me . . . trust Spike.”

Buffy turned back to the pair. Hallie was at the railing and Spike was stalking slowly up behind her as the silent party raged through the club.  Buffy closed her eyes and sent a prayer to anyone who was listening before opening them again to watch and wait, as Willow had advised.

Buffy’s hands were balled into fists; her nails dug into her palms as she held her breath and watched the pair on the balcony. She hoped Willow knew what she was doing . . . because Buffy still wasn’t completely sure. 

Buffy was sure that if Spike went through with what he was suggesting right in front of her, she would lose her mind – and no person, demon or fumigation-proof cockroach in the place would be able to escape her madness.  She’d seen an insane Slayer before; she’d fought an insane Slayer before . . . she felt like she was on the verge of becoming an insane Slayer at that moment.

Spike put his hands on the railing on both sides of Hallie, blocking her in, as he pressed his body against her and lowered his head so his mouth was near her ear. 

“Do you want me?” Spike asked her in a deep, rumbling voice.

Hallie swallowed hard and nodded her head.

“Say it . . .”

“I want you,” Hallie told him.

“I want you, William,” Spike corrected her.

“I want you, William,” Hallie repeated.